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[[Internal Family Systems (IFS)]]
## 1. Identify the Part
Help the client notice what’s showing up.
“What part comes up when you think about that situation?”
## 2. Find It in the Body
Anchor it somatically so the client stays focused.
“Where do you feel this part in your body?”
## 3. Check the Client’s Stance (Self vs Part)
“How do you feel toward this part?”
If the answer isn’t curious, open, or neutral, you help unblend.
## 4. Get Permission From the Protector
This is where protectors usually show up: anxiety, anger, perfectionism, shutdown, etc.
You acknowledge their role and ask if they’ll allow the work.
“Can we talk with you directly for a moment?”
“Would you be willing to give us some space so we can understand what you’re protecting?”
## 5. Ask the Protector to Step Aside
This is the explicit new step.
You’re not banishing it. You’re asking it to relax its grip.
“Could you step back a little while we talk to the one you’re protecting? We’ll come back to you.”
If it won’t step aside, you stay with the protector longer. That’s normal.
## 6. Approach the Exile
Once the protector gives space, invite the client to connect with the younger, more vulnerable part underneath.
“Let’s see if we can find the part it’s protecting.”
## 7. Get to Know the Exile
Stay in Self energy and let the exile speak.
“What does this part want you to know?”
“What is it afraid of?”
## 8. Witnessing
The exile shows memories or feelings it’s been holding alone.
“Let it show you what it wants you to see.”
## 9. Unburdening
The exile releases the painful beliefs or emotions it picked up.
You let it choose how it wants to let go.
## 10. Invite the Part Into a New Role
Once unburdened, the part shifts into a healthier function.
## 11. Recheck the System
Make sure the protectors feel OK with the change.
“How are the other parts responding to this?”