When validating clients, be sure to avoid validating logic. Validating logic keeps it in the story level. It can be debated. It can be argued about between couples. And you risk making one partner feel blamed and the other "right". Instead, focus on validating the emotion / attachment underneath. Example: Client doesn't want her partner using her car. Instead of saying, "it makes sense why you don't want him using your car because of all the XYZ reasons" It would be more effective to say something like "it makes sense that you don't want him borrowing your car because it's been making you feel unsafe and you want to tighten control around that " Logic can be argued. Emotions can't. Related Notes: - [[Therapist tips and tricks]] - [[Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)]]